(1) As a learning experience.
There are some roles in which there is a defined career path that requires you to undertake certain roles along the way. This means that you might have to do some jobs that don’t play to your strengths. Similarly, I’ve seen secondments across disciplines used as a way of breaking down barriers between silos. Both of these are fine although I would suggest keeping them short and having absolute clarity of the learning objectives, of why you’re doing it.

(2) To be a team player
Teams present great opportunities for us to play to our strengths because teams need to be well-rounded whilst individual team members don’t. However, there might be occasions when you need to fill a gap in the team and do something that doesn’t play to your strengths. A great example of this would be in football when a defender sees an opportunity and goes on the attack with the ball and team-mates move into a different position to cover the gap. It might appear sub-optimal to have players playing out of position but that is what is best for the team in that situation. One of the clearest examples I’ve seen in football is when Manchester United lost two goalkeepers in a match (one to injury, one sent off) and Rio Ferdinand (a defender) had to play in goal. You can watch it (at 3 minutes 30 seconds) here. Ideal for Ferdinand? No. The right thing to do for the team in that situation? Yes.

(3) Because you have to
I absolutely believe in doing what you’re best at and I’m very fortunate in that I get to do that every day and I’m doing something that I love. This wasn’t an overnight journey; I’m married with two step-children, a Border Collie and a mortgage and whilst I’ve taken some big risks at times, they have always been calculated ones in the light of my responsibilities. The benefits of playing to your strengths are massive. Sometimes, we just need to be a little patient and play the long game in realising them.

If you find yourself in any (or all!) of the situations I described above, I’d advise some steps to keep you on track:

- Just because you’re not playing to your strengths, it doesn’t mean you should forget about them. Remember what your strengths are and don’t lose sight of why you’re temporarily playing to your weaknesses. Similarly, don’t be disheartened about the situation and about how you might feel.

- Find ways to develop your strengths and find opportunities to use them. You might be able to do this by volunteering for things in work or the opportunities might be outside of work. I’m often fascinated by how people in the wrong job achieve amazing things outside of work or in work projects they volunteer for.

- Move towards a vision of realising your strengths. Having this as a vision means that you will move in the right direction and will seize the right opportunities as they arise. Try to make sure that your direction of travel is in the right direction.

The benefits of playing to your strengths are significant, even if we do have to be a little patient at times. If you do need to play to your weaknesses for a little while, please do it with your eyes wide open.

What do you think? What experiences do you have where playing to your weaknesses was, briefly, the right thing to do?

Featured image, credit: lusi

‘Each and every day, do what you’re best at. Play to your strengths and value other people for theirs. Everyone shines given the right lighting.’

When I wrote those words down for the first time, I worried that I was just stating the very obvious; it is hardly rocket science to do things that you’re good at and to look for the best in other people. And yet, I’ve used strengths-based approaches with hundreds of people in many organisations across differing sectors and I never cease to be surprised at what an eye-opener it is for the vast majority of people.

I do think it is obvious to do what you’re best at (and people usually ‘get it’ intuitively), but you can get thrown off track by processes that have the wrong focus; performance reviews that focus primarily on the negatives, development discussions that focus on developing weaknesses, and talent management processes that seek well-rounded individuals.

To use a sporting analogy, how does a football team get the best out of their top goal-scoring striker? I can’t really imagine performance reviews discussing how few goals they saved with their hands, development discussions focusing primarily on defence skills and a talent discussion that insists a successful striker must have played in every position in the team for a year! The team gets the best out of a naturally-gifted striker by playing them as a striker, and focusing their development on how to be an even better striker in the future.

There is much research to support the sporting analogy. Studies show significant benefits from focusing on strengths, the most obvious of which is improved performance and engagement at work, whilst the Positive Psychology movement focuses on the benefits of happiness and resilience. My own journey (after first encountering strengths-based approaches 8 years ago) is entirely consistent with this, as are the changes I’ve seen in many clients.

So, my question to you is this: Are you playing to your strengths, doing what you’re best at?

‘Each and every day, do what you’re best at. Play to your strengths and value other people for theirs. Everyone shines given the right lighting.’

In my next blog post I’ll be looking at the exceptions to this, some occasions when it is right to play to your weaknesses, and future blog posts will explore both strengths-based teams and strengths-based organisations.

Featured image, credit: mzacha

It is worth watching the video (below) and Jane Chen does a great job of telling the story. Some reflections of mine:

- There are people dying and suffering in situations that we have the ability to change.

- Things that might seem too big a problem to tackle, aren’t.

- Design Thinking (the iterative process of understanding, observing, defining, ideating, prototyping, and testing) is a powerful process. It involves a bit of humility in realising that you don’t know all the answers, it involves ‘getting out there’, and it involves a lot of failure (if that is how you choose to view learning from prototyping).

If you can’t see the video below, please click here to view.

Care. Do stuff that matters. Don’t be scared.  Get out there. Try. Learn. Do.

Potential

My mission statement is ‘Help people, teams, and organisations to realise their potential’. I chose the word ‘realise’ very carefully for its dual meaning:

realise /ˈriːəlʌɪz/ verb

1 become fully aware of as a fact; understand clearly.

2 cause to happen.

I’ve met plenty of people who aren’t seeing their potential come to fruition; sometimes because they aren’t aware of what they’re really capable of. And sometimes because, despite having a dream of how things could be, they’re not working on the right things to move towards making it a reality.

I don’t believe in the idea of ‘cosmic ordering’ where you make your intention clear and the universe delivers. Nor do I believe that success comes from just being busy. What I do believe in is becoming fully aware of what your potential is and then doing what you need to do to ‘cause it to happen’.

My own journey down this road started with understanding my strengths, making a conscious decision to play to my strengths, and then taking a load of actions and decisions to ’cause it to happen’. Some of the decisions were difficult: changing career direction, deliberately taking on a very risky and challenging job, choosing to leave the world of paid employment to set up my own business, deciding what not to do so I could focus. But slowly, and surely, things have come together which brings me on to:

Fruition

 So, how long does it take to see your potential come to fruition?

I don’t want to torture the fruit metaphor, but as fruit grows:

- It grows slowly so that you wouldn’t notice it growing if you sat staring at it.

- It has seasons and there are some great periods of growth and some that aren’t so good.

- Even though it grows slowly and at differing speeds, it does grow and there is something great at the end of it.

It is the same with seeing your potential come to fruition; it may not happen overnight, it may not be a straight road, but you do need to be moving steadily in the right direction and if you’re not seeing any growth, it is time for some serious thinking.

So, if you want to realise your potential and see it come to fruition:

1. Become fully aware of your potential

2. Cause your potential to happen. Do what it takes.

3. When appropriate, be patient

4. If you’re not growing and moving towards realising your potential, be impatient and do something about it!

This blog post is part of the UK HR Blog Carnival, where a number of bloggers are writing about ‘When potential comes to fruition’. Here is the curated list of posts.

Image credit: Levisz

I’ve been very fortunate to meet street children for myself in the slums of Kampala, Uganda. These are children who end up living rough on the streets for a whole variety of reasons. Rather than attempt to describe what I think life is like for them, I’ll simply recount some things that street children have told Retrak:

• “Women throw food for me to eat as if I am a dog.” Godwin, 10, Uganda 
• “At night we look for places like shops and hotel verandas where there are night guards for protection. But some of the night guards take advantage of our being weak and force us into sex.” Nabulungi (girl), 15, Uganda
• “I am lonely, there is no-one to care for me or watch out for me.” Kelile, 12, Ethiopia
• It is hard knowing my family don’t want me back.” Yonas, 13, Ethiopia
• “I am ashamed of this life, we do not like it but we have no choice.” Iskinder, 13, Ethiopia 
• “Being raped is the worst thing that can happen to a girl. It shatters the future and leaves you hopeless, depressed and with a very low self esteem.” Namono (girl), 16, Ethiopia – A street mother in Addis Ababa whose baby had died one day before this.
• “On the street death is always around the corner.” Ibra, 12, Uganda
• “I am hungry, I get abused, I get sick and there is no one to help me.” Berhanu, 15, Ethiopia
• “Please help me get off the street, to give me new life and hope.” Geteye, 14, Ethiopia 

I find it heartbreaking to read these, but then I read the quotes from children helped by Retrak:

• “Staying at Retrak has saved me from beatings on the street” Eddie, 13, Uganda 
• “Retrak rescued my life, I was sick, I had no hope of life again but now I do!” Akiki, 15, Uganda 
• “I now have someone I can call father and mother, I have a family where I am accepted” Joseph, 15, (In Retrak Foster care) Uganda

Retrak not only provides food, shelter and medical help to children on the streets but also works to reintegrate children with their families, their communities, or foster carers. Retrak is making a difference that lasts and has so far reunited  over 1,000 children with their families, children whose lives are transformed and who go from no hope to a future filled with hope.

Greater Manchester Police have been great supporters of Retrak and I had the opportunity to interview Sir Peter Fahy, Chief Constable, about why he supports Retrak and about his experiences of meeting street children in Africa.

This short video also gives a good overview of how difficult life is for street children and of the difference that Retrak makes.

Like Retrak, I believe no child should be forced to live on the streets. We can do something about it.

Anybody who knows the Holstee Manifesto will guess at the source of my inspiration for the manifesto although I’ve deliberately not copied the style of theirs.

And I was interested to see the Good Citizen Manifesto from TEDxDubai:

It was over a Strategic Latte with Catherine Wilks from In Movement that we both decided to publish something that we’d both been thinking about for a while and you can read Catherine’s in her blog post, ‘Raising the game‘.

If you’re a fan of manifestos, have you written yours? You don’t have to write it down, but I do believe in the power of being really clear what it is you’re here to do and how you’re going to go about it. Then all you have to do is live it. 100%. Being really honest, the part of a mine that I struggle with most is to not work too hard. That’s a little hypocritical given the workshops I run on resilience, but I’m working on it!

I’d like to illustrate the point with an Olympics-related metaphor, but one that hasn’t been written about a lot; Dressage. I thoroughly enjoyed watching it and it was a delight to watch rider and horse in perfect harmony. I used to ride a lot and compete in dressage (at a very basic local level), so I appreciate the skill all the more.

In my dressage lessons, sometimes ridden without a saddle to help me develop my balance, I learned a very simple but valuable lesson that sticks with me as a reminder today: Where you look, you go. It worked like this:

• To go straight on,  sit upright, hold your head up high and focus on a point straight ahead in the distance. The horse, a very intelligent animal, will pick up on these signals and go in a straight line.

• To turn, again just look where you want to go. As you turn your head, your whole body will shift slightly and the subsequent movement of the reins,  seat, and legs will be picked up by the horse who will dutifully go in the direction you want.

• Want to fall off? Easy; spend your time worrying about falling off and looking at where you don’t want to go, the ground. Where you look, you go.

• Want to totally confuse the poor horse? Easy: just give loads of conflicting signals about what you want and where you want to go! It might sounds odd, but it is a common mistake in beginners that they’ll simultaneously give signals to tell the horse to stop, go, turn left and turn right!

Where you look, you go. I believe this applies equally to people, teams, and organisations and I want to challenge you on where you’re looking.

• As a person, where are you looking? Are you focusing your thoughts, your energy, and your efforts on a successful outcome that your eyes are firmly fixed on? Or, do your eyes keep getting distracted by shiny new opportunities or, worse still, are you spending time worrying and focusing on what you don’t want? Where you look, you go.

• If you’re part of a team, are you all looking in the same direction? If I interviewed each member of the team about what success looks like for the team, would I get one clear direction or several conflicting ones? Are your team meetings clearly focused on where you’re heading?

• From an organisational perspective, lets start with the assumption that your employees are all trying to do what they think is the right thing for your organisation and are all making the best of what they think is available to them. So, are you making it crystal clear to everybody where you’re heading, so they each know where to focus? Don’t forget that people will figure out what’s important not just from what you say (such as a written mission, vision, and values), but from how leaders behave, where your focus is, who you reward and promote etc. So, are you an organisation that makes it really clear about where you’re heading and what you expect from people or are you a bit more like the beginner rider who is constantly sending conflicting signals about what you want?

Where you look, you go. Are you being intentional about where you’re looking?

- Positive psychology is not the same as positive thinking / looking on the bright side and is so much more. Also, we’re all allowed to have a bad day!
- The power of ending each day by reflecting on (and writing down) three good things from the day. I now do this almost every day and share them on Twitter with the #3GoodThings hashtag (as do many other people)
- How focusing on your strengths plays a major part in reaching ‘Authentic Happiness’. I’m a big fan of strengths-based approaches and they feature in a lot of my work.
- The role of ‘a third place’; not work or home (the first and second places), but somewhere else where you can be your best self. At the course, I was struggling along with a broken ankle and hadn’t been able to go to ‘Happy Valley’ (my usual location for walking my dog) for a number of weeks. I realised that this is very much my ‘third place’ and the venue for some of my best reflecting and thinking!

The slides from the event give a good summary:

There’s also a great post ‘Round-up of coverage from Positive Psychology in Application‘ by Martin Couzins.

If you want to know more about Positive Psychology as a topic, it would be worth reading some of Martin Seligman’s books. The workshop ‘Positive Psychology in Application’ is run by Sukhvinder Pabial (Twitter: @SukhPabial) of Challenging Frontiers.

1. Be self-aware

Get into the habit of noticing how resilient you’re feeling and, if you’re feeling a bit stressed, pay attention to what you think is causing the stress. (Just for now, I’ll let you get away with blaming other things for causing stress)

2. Keep your perspective

When you’re feeling stressed, it is easy to lose your perspective and relatively minor issues can seem like big things. One really simply way to keep your perspective is to think how important something will be when you look back on it one year from now. If you really want the ultimate perspective on what counts, have a look at ‘The top 5 regrets of the dying’. When you get a proper perspective, what seem like huge issues may not be as big.

3. Focus on what you can control

As I wrote in my last post, burnout doesn’t happen overnight and it is often a result of loads of poor choices. Nobody would choose to be a bit ‘dented’ but that is the reality of what often happens; People spend a lot of time and energy blaming things that are outside of their control (the amount of potential work, the way their boss behaves, the organisational culture etc.) and then make poor decisions about things that are within their control.
Rather than get stuck in this rut, focus on what you can control and on making good, healthy decisions every day. You can’t control the amount of potential work but you can control how you prioritise. You can’t control the way your boss behaves but you can control how you respond, how it affects you, and whether you continue to work for them or for the organisation.

4. Maintain healthy habits

There are a number of healthy habits that most would agree are beneficial: Eating well; drinking alcohol and coffee in moderation and drinking plenty of water; getting enough quality sleep; getting fresh air and walks outside; exercise; spending time with friends.

They’re all fairly obvious but, when we’re busy or stressed, we sometimes choose to drop them. I say choose because nobody forces us. Choose to maintain these healthy habits and don’t drop them or replace them with unhealthy ones.

5. Have a support network

Your friends and family, your support network are so important yet people who are struggling often start to disengage from people around them. Don’t. If you haven’t got a good support network, build one and be part of other people’s support networks. Remember that coaching can also be a part of your support network. One of the ways I keep my own support network going is through the Strategic Latte and they are a great help to me!

And that’s it: some simple strategies to make sure that you don’t let yourself get compressed too far for too long and get ‘dented’. Simple strategies that are worth doing consistently so that they become habits and keep you in good shape, whatever you face. Please don’t let yourself get ‘dented’. It isn’t worth it.

This post is part 3 of a series on Personal Resilience. Other posts are:

1 – Are you working too hard?

2 – What is resilience?

When things go wrong in my life, it generally doesn’t take me a long time to get back to normal.

… is adapted from a question on resilience posed by the University of Cambridge Well-being Institute and provides us with a really helpful definition of resilience in terms of bounce-back-ability.

Resilience isn’t about having a rock-like quality to cope with whatever pressure comes your way without showing any sign of weakness. It is the ability to bounce back quickly.

There’s a common illustration of resilience which compares a tennis ball with a table tennis ball.

‘Permanently dented’ might sound a bit extreme but it isn’t uncommon and I’ve worked with plenty of clients who’ve needed some support to bounce back after difficult times and prolonged periods of pressure. If you’ll forgive a brief rant, I’m always incredibly disappointed that as organisations and leaders, we let people become dented. This doesn’t happen overnight and often plays out slowly over a period of time. It isn’t a sudden accident, but a series of poor choices and missed opportunities to make things different. If we believe that ‘people are our greatest asset’ then we can’t stand by and watch people become dented. That said, we each need to take responsibility for our own resilience, and more of that in the next blog post.

For now, I want to finish by listing some of the early warning signs that we might look out for in ourselves and others. This isn’t intended as a checklist diagnosis, but to provide some things to watch out for:

• Feeling tired all the time
• Having constant colds
• Dropping healthy habits like exercise, good diet, and getting plenty of sleep and replacing them with unhealthy habits (like eating junk food and drinking too much coffee and/or alcohol)
• Becoming less sociable and disengaging from those around you
• Feeling out of control and compromising on your own values to please others
• Feeling frustrated and that you’re never doing enough
• Struggling to concentrate
• Grumpier than normal
• A general feeling of negativity and gloominess

In the next blog post in this series, I’ll look at some ways to be more resilient. In the meantime, my challenge to you is to pay more attention to resilience and notice some things. How are you doing; Absolutely fine? A bit compressed but in good shape to bounce back? On the way to being dented? And what about people around you; how are they doing?

This post is part 2 of a series on Personal Resilience. Other posts are:

1 – Are you working too hard?

3 – How to stay resilient